There I Fixed It
-Dumb hacks that end up being great
- -Heads Up
-- This presentation uses a souped-up version of reveal.js -
-- Go here on your laptop, smartphone or tablet: -
- -Who the hell are you?
- -
-
- What the hell is this?
-
- 
- In the beginning.
-- There was SQL. -
-- And it was okay. -
-And then...
-There was noSQL!
-And it scaled and it was all javascripty and all the hipsters loved it and everyone was happy. -
But then you want to actually use it
-
-var request = http.request({
- host: 'couchdb.internet.com',
- path: '/awesomedb/_all_docs',
- auth: 'zer0c00l:God'
-});
-request.end();
-
-var newrows = []
-request.on('response', function (response) {
- response.on('data', function (data) {
- data.rows.forEach(function(row){
- row.value.walkThe = "dinosaur";
- newrows.push(row.value);
- });
- });
-});
-request.end();
-
-var request = http.request({
- host: 'couchdb.internet.com',
- method: 'post'
- path: '/awesomedb/_bulk_docs',
- auth: 'zer0c00l:God'
-});
-
-request.write(JSON.stringify({docs:newrows}));
-
-request.end()
-
- unql-node
-- - https://github.com/sgentle/unql-node - -
-It's like SQL for NoSQL
-
- Deletin' stuff
-
-> delete from checkins where username.match(/\d{4}$/) && timestamp > (new Date()).getTime()-1000*60*60*24*7
- Why don't we take all the data...
-
-> create collection nag_old_users
-> insert into nag_old_users select {username: username, email: email} from user where last_login < (new Date()).getTime()-1000*60*60*24*7
- And put it over here!
-Want to see my awesome LALR recursive descent parser?
-
- Nope!
-
-handle /delete from (\S+)(?: where (.*))?/, (db, expr, cb) ->
- query = "update #{db} set _deleted = true"
- query += " where #{expr}" if expr
- processExpr query, cb
- There I fixed it.
-
- noDB
-So you want to add some persistence to your simple web app.
-Okay so just require that each user have a couch installation.
-Or make redis a dependency. Probably include some build scripts or something to make it easier since it's the only thing in the app that needs to be compiled.
-
- Maybe it would be easier to build SQLite?
-Nope!
-
- noDB
-SQL < noSQL < noDB
-Super simple
-
-var users = JSON.parse(fs.readFileSync('data/users.json'))
-
-users.push({name: "newguy"});
-fs.writeFileSync('data/users.json', JSON.stringify(users));
-res.send('success');
- Session storage too!
-
-var store = new express.session.MemoryStore;
-store.sessions = JSON.parse(fs.readFileSync('data/sessions.json'));
-
-setInterval(function(){
- fs.writeFileSync('data/sessions.json', JSON.stringify(store.sessions));
-}, 2000);
- It's basically Redis
- It's not really -But it is:
--
-
- Deployable -
- Dependency free -
- Easily backed up -
- Debuggable -
Databases: Fixed
-
- I would like to make some information available on the internet.
-So find a shared hosting provider or something.
-But they're kind of crappy
-So I'll just run my own
-On nginx or express or something!
-But load balancing and updates and bugs and oh no.
-Oh I know!
-
- 
- - Augh. I wish I could just shove all this right on Akamai --
...
-...
-...
-Why not?
-Step 0: Generate static site
-Use whatever you want. We really like Jade.
-
-!!! 5
-include includes/head.jade
-body
- include includes/header.jade
- // BEGIN Content
- .inner-bg
- #content-wrapper
- Welcome to zombocom!
- make
-
-JADE = $(shell find pages/*.jade)
-HTML = $(JADE:.jade=.html)
-
-all: $(HTML)
-
-%.html: %.jade
- ./jade/bin/jade < $< --path $< > $@
-
-clean:
- rm -f $(HTML)
-
-.PHONY: clean
- Rackspace == Akamai
-It's cheap. 18c per GB
-You don't have to deal directly with Akamai. Keep your soul!
- -Getting it there
-There's a node library for that.
- -There's also some tooling for that.
-https://github.com/PinionTech/cloud-loader
-
-coffee cloud-loader.coffee -x localDir cloudContainer
- Deep magic
-
-curl -i -X GET -H "X-Auth-User: pinion" -H "X-Auth-Key: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX" "https://auth.api.rackspacecloud.com/v1.0"
-
-curl -X POST -H "X-Container-Meta-Web-Index: index.html" -H "X-Auth-Token: XXXXXXXX-XXXX-XXXX-XXXX-XXXXXXXXXXXX" "https://storage101.dfw1.clouddrive.com/v1/MossoCloudFS_ad499859-aaed-43c6-813b-5e1c545f85cf/pinion-www
- Relax
-Never ever care about whether your website is up.
-Go do something useful instead.
--
Yeah, it's harder to do pretty URLs.
-So fixed
-
- It's not always the right thing to just fix it
-But sometimes it is
-
- ALL FIXED
-BY David Banham and Sam Gentle
-
-